Online Editing

Our assignment for Module Week 9 is to find an article written for publication and transform it into a user-friendly online document with a different purpose and focus on structure, style, and navigation. The original document is simply titled Rome by Mark Hudson. A classical studies minor at East Carolina, I have always been intrigued by Rome and all its wonders. I thought it would be a nice topic and searched specifically for articles on this seemingly amazing city. Having never actually visited Rome myself, I have to rely on the sights, sounds, and smells always talked about by others. On to the editing.....

First I’ll critique Hudson’s article in an effort to find possible flaws and readability issues. I will then cut down the information and decide which parts of the remaining text fit my purpose.

Title/Purpose: Hudson’s title is simply Rome. How can that do the city justice? There is no spark, no passion! I do not feel the energy of the location or the desire to read the article. It doesn’t tell me what the article is really about or what I can expect upon further reading. Hudson himself refers to the city as "monumental," but his title doesn't give that impression. I would at least add a subtitle giving a hint of whats to come. My purpose is to create an itinerary of sorts—an informational/review site that would entice a traveler to visit Rome and give them an idea of what to expect and what they might do on their visit.

Content: Though Hudson’s memories of his first visit are interesting, they’re gonna have to go. Creative nonfiction has no place in my revamped document. I’ll be focusing on what Rome has to offer and placing those points under headings with brief description.

Additions: I’ll create links when applicable to certain portions of the document—hotels and events that might interest a reader and potential visitor. Hudson linked the word Rome repeatedly in his document to the same resource. His link is pertinent but redundant; it takes you to a hotel page, but a reader wouldn’t know that without further navigation. It should be a bit more obvious where the link will take you. I’ll use his resource, but it will be linked as "accommodations." I’ll also add mock links to maps, airlines, and travel agencies for the readers’ convenience. Hudson's article has no visuals; we've all heard the saying, "a picture is worth a thousand words." It's cliche, but we all know it to be true. Since I'm transforming this piece for the Web, I'll add at least one visual so the reader can imagine him or herself walking around enjoying the sights.

My edited version is below. Again, my intention is to provide a more scannable and readable piece for someone who may be thinking of travel. Theoretically, this would work well on a review page dedicated to popular travel destinations. Thanks to Mark Hudson for writing such an evocative piece. Note: my changes in no way reflect the author, will not be reproduced, and are for assingment purposes only.

Rome:
The most monumental city on Earth

Description: center of western civilization, full of history and old world charm

Climate: tropical, sensual, romantic
Note: high temps in late summer (hot days, cool nights)

Features: cobble streets, ancient buildings, great columns and arches, religious backdrop, churches, palaces, art (Caravaggio, Michaelangelo, Raphael, Greek and Roman sculputure), vast basilicas, splendid avenues, museums

Favorite Attractions:
the Colisseum
the Pantheon
the Sistine Chapel
the basilica of St Peters
the Vatican
Villa Borghese
the Palazzo Doria Pamphili
marble monument to King Victor Emmenual
the Spanish Steps
the Trevi Fountain

Popular Accommodations:
The Inghilterra
The Hotel de Russie

Famous residents/travelers of the past:
Handel
Scarlatti
Liszt
Mendelssohn
Hemmingway

Other links:
Restaurants
Hotels
Tickets
Travel Consultants
Maps